Haven't posted in a while. In the last six weeks I've lost two cats (Tondra and Sarah) and one job.....
And we're going into week eleven, if I recall correctly, of trying to get my Q@#$Q@ broken foot to heal. I think it's working---it's starting to hurt and I'm told by several sources, both doctors and them-as-has-btdt, that that's a sign of healing. I certainly hope so.
Doing my bit to heal it: wearing the dratted electrical bone stimulator every day....dancing on it at powwow in the sacred dance circle....
Doing a lot of reading...contemplating...praying...and I found a quote that's stuck with me:
(Apparently originally said by Jerry Jampolsky, although there are other candidates.)
It never occurred to me before, but that's a very real aspect of resentment. We think what it's about is wanting redress made in the present for past hurts, but it really isn't: we want intervention retroactively, past hurts fixed **when they happened**. We might settle for present redress, but it isn't really what we ache for.
It's odd: even when we grasp this, and know intellectually that the past *can't* be fixed, we don't immediately leap to losing the resentment and full forgiveness. It's a really strong example of the difference between knowing something in your head and knowing something in your gut.
